The Eastern Carribean, April 2009 (YAHOO!)

OK! So I finally figured out how to post pictures on this thing!! YEY! This was Andrew and I's amazing belated honeymoon. We enjoyed it so much-- enjoy the pictures!! (By the way, if you want to view our trip in chronological order.... start from the bottom... I couldn't figure out how to rearrange them.. still learning here, guys. Have patience with me!)

HERE THEY ARE!!!!

'I saw my life flash before my eyes!.....' And it was anything BUT boring.

More than a month goes by and I am way behind on this blog. In the time I wrote the last blog post, I have been to Knoxville to Orlando, FL to Denver/Pueblo, CO to Memphis,TN to Miami, FL then out to the deep blue sea on a long-awaited honeymoon cruise on the Caribbean with my wonderful husband (we had a fantastic time!) then back to our home in Columbus Mississippi…. A place we call home, but it seems just visit on the weekends before the next adventure calls…. Haha! It’s been crazy trying to adjust into the swing of things here (speaking of which, I just missed the trash man…. Again….AGH!!! O well, someday I will get down the Wednesday trash schedule down). And with Andrew beginning pilot training soon (May 15th), we have got to get kicking!

Yesterday, we went shopping for some puppy supplies--- and yes! I said puppy!! After many weeks of praying about this decision, the Lord has moved in my husband’s heart and given him the sufficiency of peace for actually getting a puppy (AHHHH!!!! See, our family is already expanding!). Sadly, the breeder we have been looking at for some time just sold all of her puppies. We were sad at first, but after running to the Lord with my sadness, I realized that was God’s way of saying “those are not the puppies I have picked out for you”. It was a serene thought that smoothed over my sadness with hope that the Lord was still at work and He had better in mind. Now, I have my complete trust in Him (not the circumstances) for our new addition our family! Whoever he/she is, we will wait on the Lord for their arrival. It’s such a peaceful alternative to trying to plan your life out in your own wisdom (which you no longer determine for yourself anyways—thank the Lord!!)

Outside the great anticipation we have for our puppy, we have seen the Lord doing such glorious work in both Andrew and I’s life through both joys and sorrows. We have realized daily more of who the Lord is, how much more we see the Lord when we come to him in humility and full awareness of who we are serving and how He is using all that occurs in our lives for a reason. Last night, Andrew mentioned how blessed we were because of all the people we have been able to come in contact with in the last couple of months—even the past week there have been many!! Wow… that was something to awe in! Here I was, really feeling like I had lost a lot by moving so much, but actually God has done with me just what He had always had planned for me: to come in contact with many different people, different ethnicities, different nationalities all for the purpose of encouraging their lives with the good news of Christ all in different ways! And there have been so many ways the Lord has worked for His glory in all of those different situations. Andrew and I have always wondered why God has given us a desire to have lots of people in our lives, surrounding our hearts and consuming our mind with thoughts of loved ones and new acquaintances. The Lord filled our hearts with that desire so we might use that inclination to tell many about Him and bring much glory He deserves through that fruit He set upon our hearts. Honestly, we were greatly struggling with the thought of pilot training and being separated for a good amount of time…. But if it means backing out on what God has called us to do for Him through the outlet of pilot training, we both knew we couldn’t accept anything less. It has been ultra comforting to realize that the Lord is the engineer of it all… our whole life has been determined by the Lord, now we just need His help to accomplish it all in the manner in which He called us (Eph 4:1 and 1 Cor. 3:1-23). So pilot training, here we come!!!

The one thing I would like to leave you with (on the shortest blog I have ever
written!!) is to remember that you are a child of the Lord. That means we have a lot to learn from our Father, but we have to come in a humble way in order to learn all of the glories of Himself, learn more about life and to take joy, having peace, no matter what comes your way. And remember, with a heart that is ready to act as Christ acted on earth, God is willing and able to use you in all sorts of outlets in your life. Continue to ask your father for a new, enlarged hear daily (Psalm 51) and He will give you the riches of life: the joy and satisfaction of knowing Himself, our Lord and Savior.

God is faithful

Wow.. for the last couple of weeks I have been working on this blog and now FINALLY I have finished it! I am so sorry for the delay. For those of you that keep up with this weekly, thank you very much for being patient with me and I apologize for this being so delayed. Moving in and out so many times for the last couple of months can really take a toll to my ability to get this thing out! Anyways, here's the last couple of weeks up to the present. ENJOY!! :

Through the spirit’s leading, my prayer life has been shown to me in a different light. The things on my heart are greatly important and telling them to the Lord shows that I take all things (big and small) to the foot of His throne, but the focus of our prayer’s deliverance should not be seeking the answers themselves. Instead, it should be about seeking the One who gives the answers in His time. Doing it any other way reflects a heart of spiritual lust. Spiritual lust is defined as demanding an answer from God instead of seeking the Lord himself. I need to, instead, trust God, seek His kingdom and await His answer patiently. While I wait, I should also be evaluating my requests with how they fit in with sharing the gospel with those who need truth. I like the way Oswald Chambers puts it: we have been ‘separated unto the gospel’. That means, being made separate from the world, we are called to be representatives of God’s love, grace and mercy with everything in our lives…. Was that reflected in my requests? Am I acting as a witness unto Him and to Him alone? This does not mean I live my life to please those around me, but to appease God who taught me how to do these things in order that the world may know that I love the Father (John 14:31). There is peace in knowing I am not a slave to what the world demands for me to be. God has called me to be in peace with this truth: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. “(2 Cor. 5:17) I am not of the world anymore, but have been separated for the gospel’s sake!! Though sin and busyness can sometimes consume my mind with thoughts of dissatisfaction in where I am right now, God has not left me to myself, but instead, sent the spirit “in [Christ’s] name; he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I[Christ] have said to you” so I might have peace in knowing that God is in control, no matter what threat sin sends to steer me away from my Lord’s calling (John 14:26, 27a).

God has been good to teach us the benefit of true stillness, examining our hearts to make sure that it is listening to God as it should—like a child, who is without the different concerns laid upon our hearts. My dad has been telling me this for years. When I would be become bored on the stillness of our dock, I would him I wanted to do something besides nothing. “Kati,” he would say as he rocked in the hammock, “learn to enjoy being bored, just for a little while longer. Someday you’ll appreciate it.” And he, being the best example of what it means to work hard and play/rest hard, has finally gotten through to me. I didn’t understand then, but man, do I understand it now. Stillness is hard to come by in our adult life where many outlets demand that our minds be fixed on our to-do lists, meals to fix, bills to fret over/pay, and fulfilling goals we have set for the New Year. But “God is greater than our hearts and knows everything” I John 3:20—He knows what’s best for us which is why He commanded us not to get too caught up into the world’s concerns, for they will draw you away from the Lord (which is it’s goal). Instead, he wants us to resort to a child like heart, letting the only real concern in our life be knowing Christ and his cross more daily (1 Corinthians 2:2). The stillness is now like a special friend and an understood priority I must learn to make time for in my life if I want to benefit from the blessings God pours out on my life everyday--- all because of His infinite mercy and kindness! It’s a daily battle, but learning how to fight it out of the strength of the spirit and not my own, I will learn I will always be victorious each time.

Another great thing the Lord did while we were in Montgomery was giving us encouraging fellowship with both people all over the U.S. from our flight and then, also, friends that have joined us from Columbus, our new home. It was so refreshing to go into a room and talk of the similar struggles we have all experienced in the name of advancing the gospel and being sons of light. But the best thing that came out of it was the realization that we needed more time in the word, we need more of the Lord’s intervention in a Mission Impossible task of making known the love of our Savior instead of trying to do it all on our own. I especially struggled with this when I attempted to make known the Lord to an atheist, a girl with no real desire for faith and a Jehovah Witness in my own strength. When I expressed my troubled heart to my friend Emmy and Kurt, I was again reminded that I was trying to do something without the spirit’s leading. The bible study really encouraged us to think of ASBC was a great learning experience for both our living out/ sharing the gospel and our time in the Word. And that’s just what it was, greater than any of other part of training they gave Andrew. It gave us just a taste of how hard it was going to be to balance the Word with a busy undergraduate pilot training (UPT) schedule (we still have a lot of kinks to work out and need a lot of the Lord’s help; please to praying for us in this time!!) but it also reminded us of how much more we needed the Word, and making time for it is absolutely vital in doing the Lord’s work. We need to be led by the spirit to do the Father’s will, walking and talking in the way He leads us, according to His will.

During our last few weeks in Columbus, we were blessed to come back into Knoxville for a weekend visit. It was refreshing to see both old friends and family! My soul rejoiced as were blessed with rest and fellowship all weekend long. We celebrated a “surprise” birthday party for my brother Ty, which ended up not to be such a surprise to our finding out (oh well, he had a blast which is what counts), and had a blast spending time with him and my brother-in-law Matthew as we went rock climbing in the Sequoyah area. We were especially excited about going to church and being united with the rest of Christian brothers and sisters in Christ! It was wonderful! Bill Kittrell talked of the wonders of the church and its role in our relationship with Christ. He encouraged us to look at the example of Paul and his role of building up the church. Then, the greatest truth of the whole sermon was knowing that because Christ came and made able the Spirit, we are now the temple of God opposed to a building or structure (1 Cor. 3:16-17). Believers are now what define the church. What a glorious and encouraging thought that was as we departed again after Andrew’s flight lesson for Montgomery! Departing from family and friends is always a bit sad, but the fog lifted a bit once we hit Maxwell AFB and saw our dear brothers and sisters from our TDY flight. It was good to be home… and yes, I meant Maxwell.
The Lord then taught me from a passage in 1 Thessalonians 5 how to truly love and care for his church and others in a way that glorifies Him. Encouraging the Thessalonians to “keep awake and sober” (v.6), he spoke of building up one another through words of encouragement and prayer, doing good to everyone as an act of worship (v. 11-15, 25). This encouraged me to start looking outside my own needs and desires and look to others to see what I could do to advance the gospel in the way I obeyed the Lord, loving those around me—especially the church. He led me to write emails in His name, letters, and give resources that would meet the need of desiring to seek God more (like books and Bibles). It was most encouraging to me to know that these things were happening because of the Lord’s work in my life and His leading alone: “He who calls you is faithful, he will do it” (1 Thes. 5:24). His grace covered all He led me to do and Christ himself was evidently with me the whole time (v.28). Blessed be the name of the Lord (Isaiah 40)!!

During this blessed time of following his divine leading, I was able to understand what sanctification was meant to do; sanctification was intended to be an intense concentration on God’s point of view, making all that is not in the Lord be weeded out until all we desire is His purpose alone. This will put us in the same disposition to be ruled by the Lord as Christ was here on earth if we learn to do what is according to God’s will. Jesus prayed we might be one with the Father as He is with the Father… and that is what was made possible through His death and the coming of the Holy Spirit. Now we need to rise and do what God’s called us to do in His power!

However, the question now was how is the testing of my faith through trials intended to sanctify me and how was it actually reflecting the Lord? The answer lie in James 1: “The testing of your faith produces steadfastness” so we lack nothing in Christ, making our testimony to the Lord stronger by the refining of fire; this is why it is counted as joy (v. 2-4)!

I recently opened up a book called “Multiple Blessings” in Panera Bread when Andrew and I went on a reading date. It was so neat to see how God had strengthened this woman of eight small children’s faith. She had a quote that just caught my heart as I related to her desire to live out what God called her to in motherhood:
“I wanted not only to survive my calling. I wanted to rise up, grasp it with both hands, and thrive in my calling as Jon’s wife and mother of all eight of my children”—Kathy Gosselin.

She went on to tell about the six wonderful things that the Lord had revealed most about Himself in her life… and I as well have learned a lot about the Lord through them:


1) God is in control (Romans 8:28 is a great promise for believers to remember) and all He calls us to do in our calling is really RELY ON HIM!

2) God is gracious and strong (Isaiah 40:31). He will give us a never run out of living water or strength for us, no matter what the task! He is always willing to fill our cup each time we ask!

3) The Lord can be trusted. Our job is to be obedient; it’s our calling. This is one of the closest promises to my heart. Just recently, we left Maxwell and headed back to Columbus. It was a sorrowful drive for me as Andrew and I left our new friends and our awesome gift of fellowship to be thrown back into Columbus to start all over again. In fact, it almost felt like the last day of summer camp. You know, when everybody exchanges addresses, gives like a million hugs--trying not to cry as you hug your new best bud, and beg everyone to stay in touch knowing that only a small percentage will. Well, not much of that routine changes when you become an adult and leave military training in Maxwell. Saying goodbye to friends you become so attached to in six weeks, without even realizing, was almost as hard as leaving life-long friends in Knoxville. The Lord has blessed us so so much and, sadly enough, I didn’t start to really savor it until the end. However, even with that regret, I would have never taken any of what happened back. God blessed us with a great flight, a wonderful living set up, great godly couples and individuals that always surrounded us. The last six weeks have been filled with trials, growth in humility and with our marriage, and TONS of God’s grace. And even though I doubted a while, the Lord filled my heart with reassurance that He could be trusted. Columbus is where He had obviously led us and this is where He would do His work. And it seemed right after I started to really believe that promise. Even all the daunting tasks of starting over in a new house, a new environment, and new fellowship were instead a song of praise that left my lips! I was completely satisfied in where God put us… and because of that, things started to happen…

4) God will provide (Phil 4:19). And He did! He provided a wonderfully strong couple in the Lord to come back into Columbus to! Even though we were sad about leaving, He encouraged us more with His providence to meet our needs with divine fellowship! We have been blessed to get to know these two better through the last couple of days and we are able to rejoice with them at the realization that this is our church! For now, God provided us with a very solid church (even if the congregation was just four) with sound, trustworthy doctrine. Seeing how God provides for our lives just gives me the strength and courage to wait upon the Lord more for the things on my heart.


Another good example of that is one that Andrew brought up which impacted my heart a lot for waiting on the Lord’s timing: before we got married, Andrew and I were looking for a couch for our new house. We found this one couch that we really liked…. And on top of that, for the price we liked too! It looked brand new, felt soft and unused, and was really comfortable! However, my grandmother had a couch she was going to give us for free. It wasn’t the most comfortable thing (and it wasn’t really ours) but the fact was the same: it was a gift and it didn’t cost a thing. We made the decision that we would hold off on an item we didn’t really need and take the gift. My other grandmother got it a couch cover, boosting the comfort level up a bit. While we still desired to have a couch to sink into together, we were very content with our lovely home and all we had. It was almost right after we talked about this on our neighborhood walk, we ran into our new neighbors who were still moving in. The first thing they did was coax us into a Christmas tree! Ha! (It was very funny and they really wanted us to take it, so we did!) Then after talking with them a bit, they brought up how they really needed to get rid of a lounge chair and really wanted us to take it. When went into look at it and we were shocked: it was perfect. A comfy loveseat setup that would snuggly fit the both of us with a built in footrest. We had a friend over for supper and to help us move it to our house. Trying it out for the first time that evening, we were really thankful to God for His kindness. We finally understood what it meant to wait upon the Lord, even if we really want it and think we need it now. Wait… and God might set one in your lap in a totally unexpected way! He loves to work that way.

6) Give God the glory and the praise! For all these things, lessons, trials, and blessings, God has told us they are for His glory and His praise. He is worthy of them and I am blown away by His grace. The biggest grace the Lord has reminded me daily as I look upon my ring is the gift of my husband. Right now, my husband is in Colorado for training for a month so I went back to Knoxville to stay with my family and see my dear friends. As I went to church alone this morning, my mind raced back to when I first came into this church and understood what it meant to be His child in a church who knew what it meant to be a church. First off, I didn’t know anybody and I was still in bondage of sin (control, eating, career oriented, ambitious, perfectionist, etc). Secondly, I was the farthest from a relationship than I ever thought possible. Now, God has been at work in my heart to change me like crazy, give me a new life in Him, give me understanding from the Spirit to rejoice in Him and gave me a church of brothers and sisters that I am honored to say I know and love! He also gave me my husband. What a wonderful gift He is! To raise my hands in the midst of my aloneness and see that God had provided himself, who would never leave me, and given me an incredible husband, who loves me a lot, is a moment of praise that will never escape my memory. Then, to give him even more glory, all sorts of people got up with a cardboard message of what they had been through/struggled with/battled for mission Sunday and then gave glory to God by flipping the poster to reveal how God healed/changed/worked to change them. It was very moving. There were people that lusted, lived for pleasures, lost children, lost spouses/parents, endured a long-term illness, suffered trials/hurts, struggled in an impure relationships/abusive families, unfaithful husbands, broken relationships, and all of these were restored by the Lord. A moment I will never forget; God’s glory was praised on high by the whole congregation…and it was beautiful.


On Valentine’s Day, Andrew took me on my first backpacking experience in Alabama. Though it was a very short trip, it was still an awesome trip where we learned more about God’s mercy and faithfulness. It started off rough from the very beginning, beginning with the bumpy gravel roads! We had followed MapPoint’s directions…. And they were awful. Then, we made the joint decision to drive into the park on a very low tank of gas. At every bend in the road on our long drive to the trail head (with no civilization in sight), we feared the car would hit empty and we would not have enough gas to get out of the park! Lastly, we didn’t give ourselves proper time to look at the map, thus, when we came to a fork in the trail (to cross the stream or not cross the stream) we chose the supposively “safe and sure” route: to not cross the stream. Well, on our way back from our overnight trip of constant bushing past the brush and avoiding many tree branches for several hundred yards, we discovered an actually trail… and it was across the stream! Nevertheless, God was still faithful to us, his screwy children. He had mercy on us and got us safely to Alabama on crazy back roads, our car never hit empty until three miles into civilization, and He provided a random campsite along the brook where we could pitch a tent and build a fire (we even got an excellent view of the stars that were so clear and vivid in the cool night air!). It reminded me of a good quote I heard about the Lord in relation to us as his sheep by Elizabeth Elliott: ' No matter what the sheep might do, if they are willing to be led, the Shepherd will always be more faithful than the sheep". He will always take care of us, even when we make stupid mistakes and go astray. It was a glorious thing to celebrate in God’s love that comes in many different ways from above. Praise God!

Speaking of mercy, God allowed my husband to be particularly good at mercy upon his sinful, wrathful wife. A couple of mornings after our trip, my selfishness and pride that claimed I felt worth of praise came out on my dear husband. Not being able to recall what the actually problem was, I felt ashamed and confused with my ungentle speech towards him. However, through the convicting yet reassuring text of Ephesians 5, I was given grace once again to “walk in love, as Christ loves us and gave himself up for us”(2)…even while caught up in our sins. God gave me strength to “submit to [my]own husband as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husband.” (22-24) I knew the sin I had committed against Andrew included my choice not to submit to him. Yet, Andrew forgave me immediately and showed me great mercy through kindly and gently taking me into his arms, telling me of all his love for me! What a beautiful picture of what Christ does to sinners, to his bride, daily…. What He does to you and I daily. Praise Christ for being broken bread and poured out wine for our souls to truly live!

"And the days keep rollin', rollin, rollin', rollin'..." Maxwell, Week 4

Well, two days ago officially signifies four weeks in Montgomery, Al… And wow, have we both learned a lot: About life, about marriage, about each other, about ourselves, about the world, about others, and about the Lord. I might even dare to claim that it’s been the richest (and the most humbling) time in my life. It’s amazing the things God reveals to your heart once you have left your comfort zone. The times that have been the roughest have also been the most life impacting. Andrew and I have just learned how to live with each other in a way that humbly serves the other…. Not in our own efforts (I am always bound to fail if that’s the case), but through constant prayer and crying out to the Lord. The more we do this, the more we see just how weak we really are, totally dependent on the Lord’s lead in our life/relationship. Honestly, my flesh has tried to persuade me that I’m just a failure and just need to end this pursuit of being Christ-like. BUT the gospel has never failed to preach truth to me. God has used Andrew hard card to preach this truth to me—I’m incredibly thankful for the gift God has given to me through him. Yet it’s only when I’m humble enough to realize that my own efforts to be ‘white’ and my efforts to be Christ-like and share the gospel are pointless and vain that I can allow this penetrating truth to affect my heart. I am so incredibly thankful for the literature Andrew has encouraged me to read (obviously scripture)—especially ‘10 questions to keep you spiritually healthy’ and ‘The Gospel Primer’. I can’t tell you just how much these books have ministered to my heart! What a gift these author’s works have been to my heart.

Recently, I have really been struggling with being gentle--- just gentleness in general has been difficult to me: In my thoughts, my words AND, especially, my actions. To my shame, it’s directly affected Andrew physically most of all. When I feel that I must sustain this cookie-cutter mold of a wife and a believer, I try to struggle through the vastness of my sin by myself, thus making me become closed off and distant towards Andrew, not desiring to be touched or talked to even though I never voice it. I knew this was sin (the Holy Spirit revealed this to me), yet I tried to find the origin of the root in my personal history book somewhere instead of just focusing on how to resolve sin in the glory of our only hope: the gospel. In my own efforts, I got nowhere… but it’s amazing what a little bit of faith, trust and A LOT of prayer will do for your confusion. In fact, it was in church today that the Lord had allowed me to see how to resolve this continuing issue: communication. It’s so simple right? Every couple you will talk to will emphasize the importance of this skill; it’s a part of every pre-marital counsel session, it’s a chapter of every book on marriage… but why is it so hard to actually carry out this requirement to a healthy marriage??? Why? Because our human pride makes it harder said than done. You cannot prepare for it without actually following through to practice it as well. It will become nothing to you but good retained knowledge… and that’s it. I can testify to this truth because I have fit these shoes of error well for the last couple of weeks. It’s been a tough battle to get out of this war with myself, but it’s been worth every tear and every tower that has crashed as a result of this struggle. I have hope that the Lord is still at work at this area of my life, for Andrew’s sake and for my relationship with Christ.

The blessings have also continued to pour out even more so than all the struggles! Praise God! Fellowship has continued to become stronger by the day as God strengthens our heart daily (Lam. 3:21-24) and He has given us so many people in our daily lives that have blessed our walk with encouragement or ways that have challenged our hearts to live more for Him as our primary concern rather letting other concerns rule over us (this is why Jesus gave us Matthew 6:30).

Currently, we are driving back from Atlanta where we had just spent the weekend with 2 couples from our flight and visiting some friends/family (Travis and Lorato Lester, David Ash and Justin Lowry). Even in this time, God has poured out more blessings on us and our marriage. The time we stayed with the Lesters was a very encouraging time where Lo and Travis just encouraged us merely by their example to host and love us and our accompanying couples, making the four of them feel at home and comfortable. They did such a great job of adorning the gospel by completely opening their house and hospitality to our stay. It was such a refreshing moment for me, for this was a goal that I had set for our own house, but because I spend more time focusing on the lack of instead of being thankful for the blessed of, it had been lost in the game of dissatisfaction. However, let me just tell you how faithful God is! Through answered prayer, the church message given at Buckhead Church in Atlanta Georgia was exactly what God wanted our hearts to know as far as what to be discontent about and how to perceive true worth/gain. It was unbelievable! The message was given by Andy Stanley and it was entirely refreshing. It encouraged us to hear something so lined up with God’s word about the way we live…. Especially, financially. This has been the biggest struggle in our marriage thus far. What a God we serve: He gives us so many resources to lessen our troubles in this world so we might rather be more focused on him!
God’s faithfulness to our pursuit to becoming the person He has planned us to become has been taking new turns and twists, progressing only when we remember how we are to approach our positions in life: through lots and LOTS of prayer, trusting only in the cross and leaning on it as our only source of hope. It’s really made us refocus our prayer life and life concerns a lot… and the benefit of that (knowing Christ better) has been worth every life alteration! Just recently, God has convicted me to refocus my prayer life to be worth of the gospel, asking to know the Redeemer, rather than for rescue from trials and hardships. Paul was the reason for this heart change; his statement in 1 Corinthians 1:17 has really ministered to my heart: “For Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the gospel.” Paul saw that this one passion blotted all others out, accepting heartbreaks and tribulation which kept him devoted to the Lord. It keeps me aware to the fact that I am servant and my heart should always be content in every circumstance the Lord puts me in and takes me to, for it is His will that I am there. Thus, I now want to pray I am ‘separated unto the gospel’ (Oswald Chambers commenting on 1 Corinthians 9) so I can carry out the will of God in His way, being mindful not of my own comforts I may be lacking in my circumstances. May my heart always cry out 1 Corinthians 9:16 all my life lest I become disqualified in the race that I run!!

The Lord has also done a lot of work in Andrew’s heart lately. It’s been amazing to see his renewed awareness of his leadership responsibilities, measuring the weight of this burden and then carrying out his duty to be the leader still in our relationship… despite his many job responsibilities and busyness! It’s been so encouraging to be able to see him daily turn his ear from his heart’s preferences and instead attack the task that lay ahead, trusting God will bless him in his efforts. If you look at the leadership qualities that Paul commends Timothy for within 2 Tim. 1 and 2, you will also read about traits my husband has been faithfully living out: sincere faith, a spirit of love and self control, shared sufferer in my sins as well, guarding the word that has been entrusted to his knowledge, strength and peace from the Lord, great self-discipline to endure trials and hardships, care that produces my full trust in my Andrew, faithfulness, and mentoring me in the gospel truths that remind me where to put all my hope. He has done a great job about encouraging me to stay on track without being deceived by the world’s concerns/opinions/influences just by the way he lives. It’s refreshing to have someone like that in my life to follow and imitate in example!

I think the greatest thing he’s done for our relationship lately is encouraging me in this time I struggle with (my calling to resume my job as a wife) to make more of my free time time to run to the Lord, listening to his word and crying out to him with the cares on my heart. Any anxiety that could have overridden my focus on Christ has become nothing in light of who He is. The more I learn about the Lord, the more the struggle with anxiety lessens and my heart becomes content in where I stand in my present circumstances. I rejoice and give praise for my life is found in Him!! What a joy my walk has become because of the Lord’s kindness and mercy in giving me a husband that knows what’s worth worrying about in life: Knowing God.

Thus, this week I look forward to learning more about the Lord, being captivated more by him than anything else, making my lips want to talk about nothing more BUT the Lord that saved my sinner’s heart! What a joy!! I encourage you today to look at how you are viewing the gospel, how you’re viewing Christ’s position in your life. Are you letting your pride keep you from becoming all the Lord has intended you to become for his name’s sake (1 Cor. 4:13)? Are you allowing the reality of Redemption ‘separate you unto the gospel’ for Christ’s name to be spread alone or are you holding on to your own personal sanctification, leaving others to themselves so to avoid complications with your relationship with them? Is your life for or against God and his gospel? Are you by-passion your own comforts so to ensure the gospel is proclaimed? The Lord has, like Paul, separated us from the world to reveal His son in us, and not for any other reason but. Be encouraged as you think about that! Christ has empowered us in Himself to do the work that He has called us to…. Make some time to allow that truth to sink into the depths of your heart; make some time to talk with the Savior today.

Praise God for Grace, Humility and Prayer as an AF Wife!

Well, I have decided I am extremely bad at posting recent updates on blogs…. Even if I’m not that busy! It just seems so much goes on in my life that I can hardly record or remember it all. It’s a great problem, but I’m just horrible at good, quick solutions. Thus, I have FINALLY come up with a plan: rather than just record what has been happening in my life about my life, I feel it’s better if I recorded what God’s doing in my life and teaching my soul.

Like my friend Emmy, I have struggled in figuring out where to start reading the bible. However, my wonderful husband was there to guide me to a bible study plan that has helped me tremendously in how I should be governed by God’s word. And one of the biggest challenges my heart has been presented with is the way I’m trusting God with a desert time, learning how to fully enjoy a blessed time I could think is cursed, and learning to weight the time I give him as either spiritual ritual or spiritual health. So much God has been working out on my heart and so little time to share it all!!

First off, I can’t tell you how humble I have been made from the position I am in currently: a wife and a follower of Jesus. That’s all I can really claim. Yet, my calling is so significant to God, but to the rest of the world in whom my heart longs for their approval, it is nothing. I am nothing. And the more I walk out this journey, the more I depend on God for how I feel about myself in the world’s eyes. I have been very affected by Oswald Chamber’s advice about keeping your life concentrated only on Christ: “The golden rule for your life and mine is this concentrated keeping of the life open towards God. Let everything else-work, clothes, food, everything on earth-go by the board, saving that one thing. The rush of other things always tends to obscure this concentration on God…[let] other things come and go as they may, let others criticize as they will, but never allow anything to obscure the life that is hid with Christ in God.” Our concentration shouldn’t be on this what-the-world-thinks-of-me mindset, but on the will of the Lord, the only opinion that will EVER matter. Thus, the most encouraging model God has given me to gain strength from his humble ministry is Christ. Think about it: Christ, Lord and Creator over all, the WORD, the ALMIGHTY, the GREATEST of all that exists, came to earth in the most humble position of all: as a mortal. To top it off, he came as a lowly, average carpenter that made no outstanding trade that would distinguish him from all the other carpenters. That is all except the fact that he was lowly and just another man with a position that mattered nothing to the kings and rulers of this earth. However, even though we know who he really is, the rest of the world saw him as we saw would have seen a jobless wife in our day and time. And yet, not ONCE did he ever try to unnecessarily brag about who He was or complain about what He was sent here to accomplish. Yet he did it in LOVE and FULLY joy, knowing that greater joy lied ahead in future glory. This has encouraged me that when in the times of the shadow of the valley (the times I feel pressured to fill my empty slate with an activity or a task just to make me feel like I have a purpose or an accomplishment to brag about so that I may feel worthy) I should instead turn to the Lord and be still, throwing my day up to him, my worth up to him and saying “Here I am Lord… The Lord is my trust and I trust only in you” (Is.6:8 and Jer.17:7). God has given me this time to draw closer to Him and understand by His word and by prayer what He has in store for me, preparing me for the road ahead. I need to take this time to be still and listen to him, letting my heart enjoy the peace that surpasses all understanding (Phil 4:6-7) while I do the most important thing this life has to offer: knowing Him!!

I think Chambers says it best when he simply quotes, “Turn to me and be saved” (Is 45:22) We can almost lose sight of the Lord when we are too concentrated on our life as a Christian instead of our life hidden in Him. God wants us just to “cast all about in our minds as to what we shall do this summer, or tomorrow, and let them vanish as we come before Him. Your life will never go according to your plan if God has something greater than you would have expected, so it’s good to learn to have an open heart to look to him and celebrate in what he gives! And as a part of the military, you learn fast never to get stuck on your plans, for they never go as you would have planned anyways! Thus, my hope and prayer is to “build my hope on Him. No matter if there are a hundred and one things that press, resolutely exclude them all and look to Him.”—Chambers. He will align your life with His will and only then will you understand how giving your everything is really gaining the only things that ever mattered (Phil 3:7-10).

Another thing the Lord has made as a very important is the power of prayer. We went to a bible study on Wednesday before Andrew’s classes started led by a Lieutenant Colonel and the lesson was on prayer. It was funny how much God was teaching me about the significance of prayer, even in my unspoken concerns my spirit brought before Him. I was very nervous to come in to this study (being the only spouse and the only one not in uniform), but God made it clear to me by giving me a heart of peace that He would take care of me if I just had faith to go. And God always makes good on his word! I got there and the Lt. Col. started off by directing the group to get their attention off the fact he was in uniform or the ranking on his shoulders. Instead, he encouraged us to see him as a man, an ordinary man that has been saved by the Lord. It seemed everybody was more relaxed after he said that and my heart was definitely ministered to! God taught me so much about the power of prayer through the lesson as well… it was definitely His will that I was there and I’m so thankful He encouraged my heart to keep stepping out in faith so I may receive all of these wonderful blessings.

Just to encourage your heart, I’ll share with you what God taught me about the gift of prayer. First, God gave us the gift of prayer to talk WITH him. Sometimes, we can get so caught up with praying at God we can forget we were given the great gift of hearing what He wants to teach our hearts and listening to our cries, concerns and petitions so that we will know that “The Lord is at hand [and we are not to be]anxious about anything” (Phil 4:6-7). God also gives us wisdom to see what we might not have seen before without his revelation of such things (James 1:5) (Jeremiah 33:2-3). We can also be assured that God answers these prayers because He loves his son and sees His son in us—thus, he hears the Holy sprit, who cries out on our behalf, and blesses us with our requests, for they are from Christ (who we are now, with redeemed hearts, delighted with!) and not worldly passions—Psalms 37:4-5. He wants to help us when we come to him with willing hearts! It’s amazing to know that it is humility and admitting our need for the Lord that allows us see him working more fully in our lives! (2 Chron. 2:14). He has also led my heart to see that I need Him as early as the time I rise in the morning just as much as I need Him all throughout the day (Ps 5:3, 2 Thes. 5:16). It seems it is in the early mornings that my weakness of being tired and prone to acting off my feelings can led me to act oppositely of how I feel towards my husband and how I want to serve him (Ps 66:18, James 4:3, Ps 139: 23-24). Thus, we need God to change our attitudes so we can be still before him and come humbly in our weakness so He might make our motives and intents pure (James 4:10, Ps 46:10, 51:10). Thus, I encourage you to really think and pray that God reveals to you the essence of pray in our walk with Christ... because this is not a spiritual ritual to be taken lightly, but it is our key and our privilege that has been given to us by Christ so to grow our relationship with him more and more daily. What a gift to praise God and know God hears our every praise (Ps 19:3)!!!